Archive for the 'Film' Category

Simpsons 300

Seriously, this is one of the most hilarious and actually well edited ‘fake trailers’ I’ve ever seen! Watch it!

Legend tells of a legendary warrior…

Legend tells of a legendary warrior whose kung fu skills were the stuff of legend. He travelled the land in search of worthy foes.

Cow: I see you like to chew. Maybe you should chew ON MY FIST!

The warrior said nothing as his mouth was full. Then he swallowed, and then he spoke.

Panda: Enough talk. Let’s fight.

He was so deadly in fact that his enemies would go blind from overexposure to pure awesomeness.

Croc: My eyes!

Cow: He’s too awesome!

Rabbit: And attractive.

Rabbit 2: How can we ever repay you?

Panda: There is no charge for awesomeness…or attractiveness.

Rabbit: *gasp*

It mattered not how many foes he faced they were no match for his bodacity. Never before had a panda been so feared… and loved.

Macross Frontier

When I was young, I watched a show called Robotech. It was about pilots on earth in the year 2010 who flew planes that could turn into robots. How. Awesome. Is. That?

The thing about Robotech was that it was actually an American ‘bastardisation’ of three Japanese cartoons series called ‘Macross’, ‘Southern Cross’ and ‘Mospeada’. Strangely, though, this combination of three totally different cartoons worked out amazing well, and I was hooked.

The series actually began in 1984 and since then there have spawned a variety of other shows such as Macross II: Do You Remember Love, Macross 7, Macross Plus and Macross Zero, all revolving around the theme of big ass robots, aliens, and music that can kick those horrible aliens’ butts. Yes, there’s always some kind of love triangle, some gung-ho pilot genius flyboy and one, most probably two, hot chicks and a good friend who dies somewhere along the way.

It sounds remarkably clichéd and to be honest, it is, but it’s those HOT PLANES THAT TURN INTO ROBOTS! Damn.

But honestly, I think as with most anime, it’s the storyline and plot that really just get you most of the time, and personally, the youthful involvement that I had back in the 90s with the Robotech series that has brought me to love the Macross enterprise so endearingly. Which brings me to their latest endeavour; Macross Frontier.

Macross Frontier, to me, had a really poor start. Mainly because it just seemed to take all its ideas from the original Macross series, i.e. schoolboy who accidentally jumps into an aeroplane kills an alien and rescues a girl. That’s literally the entire first episode of the first Macross episode, duplicated. And yet, the entire series takes off on its own path from there, which I was relieved by. Sure, the whole series was meant to commemorate the 25th anniversary of Macross so in a way it paid tribute to its predecessors, but following such an unoriginal tangent wore a bit thin. But as I write this, episode 16 has just been released and seriously, I’m hooked on a plot that just forces you to ask for more.

The problem with modern day anime are the rather subversive sexual tones you find in them and unfortunately Macross Frontier is no different. There are some very weird jokes in them which make you wonder why you’re watching it, but generally speaking the jokes tone down and the usual serious global (universal) crisis plot takes over. To summarise without giving too much away, Macross Frontier is actually the name of a large colonized fleet; basically think of a dozen or so huge ass fish bowls complete with bridges, beaches, skyscrapers, sea, carrying humans through space. Naturally, there is an enemy in the darkness known as the Vajra who attack and only the best of the best can defeat them. Enter our protagonist, a pretty (seriously) boy who wants to fly and kill some aliens and along the way meets the most famous woman in the universe and also the adopted sister of his commanding officer. Throw in a couple of schoolmates who just happen to be gifted pilots (one is a sniper…coolness. Have you ever seen huge robots sniping with a huge ass sniper rifle??) and some pretty good songs (by Yoko Kanno, no less – from Cowboy Bebop and Vision of Escaflowne), and you have Macross Frontier!

You can figure out the rest. You can watch it at veoh.com or crunchyroll.com (for purely sampling purposes, you should buy it) and I highly recommend it.

Please note that even though I do like robots, I like the plot too, and it is good. I promise.

Hancock


Image taken from New York Times

Have any of you ever bought ‘First’, the Singaporean self-declared ‘Asia’s Premier Movie Magazine’?

There’s a reason why it’s all of S$4.50 while UK’s Empire is a whopping S$18.50. Allow me to cast your eyes on the recent issue which reviews Hancock with the tagline:

Hancock: Bad boy, my butt

Wow. I can feel the critic in me jump up and exclaim at the insight into that statement.

The article goes on with lines like:

the character Hancock is obviously so far from who Smith is as a person that it makes the whole picture just seem off

And:

It’s not necessarily bad cinematography, but it just adds to the overall vibe of off-ness

And:

Hancock starts as one sort of movie (good), and ends up being something else (weird and kind of lame)”

The best thing about the article is that the writer obviously looked up ‘Words of the Day’ in dictionary.com to put in one word he thought was intelligent in “moribund” that leaps out of the page due to its uncharacteristic placement in an otherwise simplistic article, but seriously, what kind of articulate critical analysis of a movie flick uses words like ‘off-ness’ and ‘kind of lame’. Oh, and how could we forget, “my butt”.

I suppose what cries out in the overall stench of mediocrity of the review is that it reads like it belongs on Stomp or some blog somewhere. But I paid for this, so why should it read like something that is even less entertaining than xiaxue.blogspot.com (and I jest not, she’s really quite entertaining).

What I dislike even further is that I actually liked the movie because it is desperately deeper than the superfluous plot so many reviews seem to insist exists in this movie. There were actually less punchlines than I expected from a Will Smith movie (“good job”) and an interesting take on a superhero’s tragic life in battling with love and mortality.

Anywho. I suppose I can’t say much, since I’m not exactly writing for the New Yorker. But can I just say, you’re (much) better off reading movie reviews on the New York Times online than spending S$4.50 on First (Asia’s Premier Movie Magazine) because for S$4.50, you can buy tomato soup and two slices of garlic herb butter bread from Saybons which is actually pretty damn nice (even if I initially thought Saybons was the worst and most horrible tragic ‘play’ of words on c’est bon but whatever…). The point is, if you are going to put down a movie in a movie magazine, at least do it well.

Go and watch Hancock, it is a not lame but cOoL A$$ MOVIE, YO!

Roger Federer…

Something about Federer that oozes class. Love this ad. (Made last year before Wimbledon 07 in case anyone is counting)

While you’re at it, you -must- watch this too.

 

24. Season 6


24: Season 6 Cast

I just finished season 6 of 24 in about 2 weeks (which if you think about it is actually quite steady and self-controlled viewing, an episode a day, or so?) so if you’re one of those people I’ve been sincerely informing of my busy-ness, now you know why. But seriously, I have been busy, so watching that amount of TV a day isn’t very beneficial for anyone, and six hour nights were really getting to me by this weekend. (Yes, yes, six hours is a lot for some).

I think 24 is one of those series that you cannot watch on a weekly basis. I tend to wait til the season is over, ‘obtain’ the entire series and then watch it in one shot, or over a week or two. The reason is because while you know that every episode is going to end to the sound of those seconds ticking to the hour with an incredibly insane, life threatening finale, you still end up incredibly frustrated when it happens. That’s one of the reasons why I never did watch season 2,3 or 4, because it just got so irritating when I couldn’t find out what happened next.

Season 6 was a bit ridiculous in parts, but I’m glad they had the guts to set of a nuclear bomb in California. Doing it in episode 4 was pretty interesting. Well done terrorists, you managed to do something without talking about it beforehand too much. I do have a feeling the producers are running out of ideas at times, there are a lot of recycled ‘situations’ and the age old ‘Jack Bauer breaks the law, disobeys orders, but makes the right decisions which the authorities only realise later’ scenario is really frustrating. It happens at least four or five times in every season. The torture sequences also really do get to you at times. Sticking a knife in someone’s knee, or a power drill in your shoulder really don’t make pleasant viewing. Still, killing off key characters is something you have to give the producers some credit for. There aren’t many series out there that are willing to take out lead characters at the risk of losing viewership. However, the seeming invincibility of Jack Bauer does get a bit implausible at times. But still. Entertaining nevertheless.

And another thing I must give credit to the 24 producers for- they really know how to pick the irritating, spineless, American civil servants. They’re there solely for the purpose of being hated, and they do it so well.

For Jack’s kills in 24, a rather entertaining website is here. Please bear in mind I in no way advocate the killing of individuals for fun.
http://www.bauercount.com/v3/index.php/season/show/6

Hors de Prix

I remember the first time I ever saw Audrey Tautou in ‘Amelie’. To be quite honest I thought she was such a bizarre femme Francais. Little did I know that that alone was testament to her accomplishment as an actor.

I never did see her following two widely screened performances. The first, I forget the name, was about her as some psychotic woman, the second, the Da Vinci Code, I never bothered watching (and no, not because I boycotted it as an anti-Christian movie, just because I heard it was crap).

However, watching ‘Priceless’, or Hors de Prix, as it is known in native tongue, I confess her performance to be rather intriguing, captivating, and so very different from the rather querky little girl that I saw so many years ago in Amelie. I wouldn’t say that it was ‘Oscar’ worthy, but I did enjoy her performance, growing from a gold-digging young woman to an essentially smitten girl with the poorest guy in town, drawn together only out of respect (or disillusionment perhaps) with someone in the same trade as herself and thence sharing a common, albeit unwitting for him, interest. It is furthermore amusing that she begins to burden herself with imparting her knowledge and ‘skills’ to satiate his, or rather, her, insatiable greed.

But having lavished all that praise upon Mdme Tatou, I must say the performance of Gad Elmaleh is equally entrancing. His initial appearance as a sartorially inept, socially inadequate (though you know his confidence lies within, only his insecurity lies with his wallet, or lack of it) individual transforms dramatically throughout the movie.  His rather deadpan, sorrowful face, by the end has a very charming and sophisticated feel to it. Amazing what a nice suit and tie (and watch) can do to a man. He reminds me somewhat of Adrien Brody. Uncharacteristically handsome.

It really is a very amusing show, full of comic, cringe worthy moments, and if you look past the rather disturbing reality that such occurrences are more than real and rather unfortunate in manner, a rather nice romantic flick. A favourite is the scene which is oft shown in the trailers where Jean (Gad Elmaleh) shows off his new, EUR30,000 watch to Irene (Audrey Tautou), posing and answering her question of the time with ‘Nine diamonds past’. Classic. Simply classic.

Go and watch.

Heroes. Volume I

Where does it come from? This quest, this need to solve life’s mysteries when the simplest of questions can never be answered? Why are we here? What is the soul? Why do we dream? Perhaps we’d be better off not looking at all. Not delving, not yearning. But that’s not human nature. Not the human heart. That is not why we are here. Yet still we struggle to make a difference, to change the world, to dream of hope; never knowing for certain whom we will meet along the way. Who among the world of strangers will hold our hand, touch our hearts, and share the pain of trying. 

Heroes, Season 1. To be honest, it was great, right until the very end. The ‘idea’ of the ending was good, but it could have been wonderful, magnificent, and the build up seemed to justify such an ending. Instead, however, it was slightly anti climatic, and while partially conclusive, seemed rushed and disjointed. While emotional, it seemed strange, and illogical. It could’ve been great.

Anyway, I won’t reveal any spoilers. Just that Hiro is really so annoying.

Paris, je t’aime

I can hardly recall a movie that has brought up such emotions such as this. What I find amusing is how I initially wanted to write about Leonidas and his abs, but somehow the aggression and passion and glory has been sucked right out of my soul and instead has been placed with a rather sweet serenity that could kick the karma out of any monk in Tibet. Okay, so maybe there’s a bit of aggression still lingering.

But last night I watched Paris je t’aime, literally, Paris, I Love You, which has been critically acclaimed and given the usual gloss over by the critics. Yes, it has 18 short stories supervised by 20 directors throughout the various arrondissements of Paris, and yes, it is in French, spoken badly in parts (by Americans no less). Yes, it has Elijah Wood in some vampire thing and Natalie Portman too. But anticipation, as with anything, is key, and it was with a vague gravity that I set my heart upon this movie. A friend wrote ‘I find it hard to believe that one can find true art in a cinema every other week for just $7’ and I would have to agree. More often than not, most critically acclaimed ‘art house’ movies have baffled me. If I’m honest, that is. Sure, you can find the hidden meaning no doubt, and you can talk and discuss and critique the production, but to truly enjoy it? Well, that’s another story altogether.

And so it was with Paris, je t’aime, that a series of short films more than surprised me, and more than captivated me. Stories that were all about love, love that was lost, love that had died, love that was resurrected and love that was sacrificed. Love that was missed, in death, and love that somehow manages to survive. Poignant images of a cheating husband who through initial sympathy, regains his love for a dying wife, amusing scenes of a father and his grandchild, stranger still of mimes falling (metaphorically perhaps?) into love.


Natalie Portman and Melchior Beslon

I shall not delve too much into the storyline lest those who have yet to see it miss out on the little surprises. But by an inch, or maybe three, my most favoured story was that of Natalie Portman and her love, the blind Melchior Beslon. Perhaps it’s the lingering memory of Portman’s performance in Closer that still so captivates me, or simply just her innate ability to play the somewhat erratic, but yet vulnerable, strong willed woman. Yet combined together with the performance of Beslon as her blind love, it so encapsulated the sort of exploratory, new, changing, evolving, emotional, spontaneous love that can sometimes so cry out from the depths of one’s heart. It was also, I suppose, the raw reality of it all, containing that care-free attitude that you so often have with those you are closest to, that ability to take on the world, and of course, the charm of the beauty of a girl like Portman falling in love with a guy like Beslon.

A close rival (perhaps nudging that three inches back to one) is Isabel Coixet’s short based in Bastille (I suggest at this point you skip to the next paragraph should you not wish to know the ending of this story) regarding the husband who, on the verge of cheating on his wife decides to love her, or at least act like he does, when he discovers her severe medical condition. Inevitably in doing so, his love for her is rekindled in such a bittersweet manner that it is apt that it is the red overcoat that so distinguishes the wife, and this story in particular, that graces the poster for Paris. That it is he who suffers later is but a worthwhile epilogue for the choices that he made. Regret, for him, is not even an issue. His love, unquestioned. His suffering, all too real.


Nick Nolte and Ludivine Sagnier

It was not that all 18 short films were truly marvelous. Indeed, some of them were just plain bizarre, like the episode involving the Chinese hairdresser and what I could’ve sworn was a Kit Chan soundtrack (though even this episode had quite a poignant note on identity and the east and west), but rather the shorts themselves felt like an old friend. Comfortable, relaxing, amusing, intriguing. Sometimes when you read a novel, the first few paragraphs can make or break your interest, and these shorts seemed to capture that moment of attentiveness perfectly. Those that were mediocre were short enough for you to let them pass. Those that were wonderful lingered in your mind, like the wonderful aftertaste of a good wine. Sip by sip, you take this movie in. And by the end of it all, a sigh, not of sadness, but rather of satisfaction, sits upon your heart.

If there is but one criticism, it is the fact that there is a rather poor attempt at joining the eighteen together at its end. That and the rather sad nature of Elijah Wood and his eternal association as being Frodo. Poor Mr Frodo.

Other than that, though, this movie is, like any wonderful friend, a must see.

In summary

pscafe.jpg
Brunch at PS

Not often does one sit alone and smile to oneself, grinning stupidly simply at a lone memory. Yet a weekend just passed with so many individual moments that could be taken simply on their own to be enjoyed, but instead were put together to surpass even the greatest of expectations. And for every moment there was a smile and laughter, and put together there was but a journey of something greater.

One can hardly say that it began on the Friday as the queuing technically began 20 minutes before Saturday began, but nevertheless, Movida was a cacophony of live latin music muddled together with the hundreds of other voices and swaying bodies present. Upon standing in Bellini, it was a curious sight to behold the excitement of individuals at the presence of Sylvester Sim in Dragonfly below, and the absence of the resonance of the percussion although they were so clear in my eyes. Like they say, in space, no one can hear you scream, and yet here in the middle of an old powerstation, I could not hear the humdrum emitting from a seemingly quiet, quiet Chinese audience in front of a stage of dancing girls with guitars due simply to the glass panels in front of me. Back in Movida, though, beer mats were the real subject of discussion, though that, I believe, is a story not for me to tell.

Saturday morning, slightly askew, though nevertheless thoroughly impressed by Singtel and their ability to hook me up to the world in a matter of hours (my connection to the world was stolen from me late into Saturday morning, though at least I had a bejeweled replacement in its stead, much to the amusement of certain others), I found myself in a place that seemed anything but Singapore. It felt like an isolated island in a sea of noise, hidden, tucked away in the depths of a land unexplored. Away from the well traveled road, a solace for the seemingly pretentious.

stjameskid.jpg
Hug me!

I found there two places that, while distinct, seemed to capture a Saturday in as perfect a way as possible. The first, a couple of friends’ kindergarten, ironically named with the patron saint of my night previously, where youthful minds ran and played and smiled and cried amidst all the games and colours in their annual carnival. It was almost Victorian, but Asian, and well, danced to the tune of the Parachute Band which I suppose made it anything but Victorian, but charming nevertheless in comparison. There is nothing really that compares with the simple enjoyment of a child, or of watching a child enjoy those simple things. How complicated life becomes when you finally discover hate and betrayal and lust and love, when instead all you want is a balloon animal, and an embrace.

The second was PS Café. To be ever so magnanimous, the world (or at least Singapore) did seem so far away, as with friends we talked and laughed and whined and deleted photos (sigh) over waffles and omelettes and sandwiches stuffed to the crust with bacon and eggs and everything you could possibly find for brunch (albeit already 3pm by now). With the afternoon sun embracing the foliage outside and the sweet scent of a lazy afternoon filling the senses, we could have sat there forever. From there to the east that mellow sunny afternoon continued as we watched a couple of episodes of Hunter x Hunter, and that distinct comfortable lethargy set in as with the breaking of waves against a sweet sandy beach, the silence of the tide withdrawing preceded another intense evening.

Made fabulous by food prepared by one for many, and the divulging, perhaps unnecessarily at times, of personal stories and the stories of others, it became apparent at one stage during the evening that you just had to stop and wonder what you did to deserve company that made you laugh til you teared on a regular basis.

Sunday was, well, indulgent, to say the least. A late wake up, a tshirt covered in fuzz and the fantastical viewing of Leonidas and his 300. That I actually could understand why Jennifer Hudson won her Oscar in the next movie gives testament to the captivating nature of her performance given the distracting memory of overly perfect men beating the hell out of the distasteful, detestful Persian armies in the most gloriously prodigiously marvelous manner known to all mankind.

Interspersed with food and the unwitting over-caffeination of a friend and the screams of scoring own goals of foosball, it was time to view the bounty of a new toy, and then sleep. Late. And hereafter, another week begins to drudge by. Though there is hope on the horizon. Youn Sun Nah and Miss Yamagata await.